BREAKING NEWS:
Gen Z Pursues Influencing Not for Fame—But to Escape Sallie Mae • CIA Intern Leaks Nuclear Codes on 4chan Fitness Board, Chaos Ensues • Can God Be Hacked? • Israel Accidentally Declares Itself a Religion After National Identity Database Crashes into Digital Torah Prototype • Man Becomes His Own Boss, Quits After a Month Citing “Toxic Self”
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