News so fake, it might as well be real

BREAKING NEWS:
Scientists Bring Back Dire Wolves: “Because What the Apocalypse Really Needed Was More Teeth” • “I Built Me First”: Double Interview with the Egos of Trump and Musk • Millions Protest Trump and Musk in “Hands Off!” March: "Get Your Billionaire Hands Out of My Medicaid" • Trump Declares Borders Are Feelings: Harvard Now a Threat Vector • Nintendo Announces New Console That Only Works When You're Sad
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